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== Ulf == | == Ulf == | ||
Ulf is a young Swedish shepherd boy who was a former host to the beard known as [[Joe Hand]]. Ulf was born in the 17th Century on the outskirts of what is now Stockholm, but was given superhuman longevity by his facial parasite. Having been freed from follicular tyranny, Ulf has been released back into the wild in Sweden, where he spends his days wearing a loincloth and shouting at the sea. Once a year, he carves a small figurine from the bones of a whale and presents it to the current LOpSoc chairman; if it is a | Ulf is a young Swedish shepherd boy who was a former host to the beard known as [[Joe Hand]]. Ulf was born in the 17th Century on the outskirts of what is now Stockholm, but was given superhuman longevity by his facial parasite. Having been freed from follicular tyranny, Ulf has been released back into the wild in Sweden, where he spends his days wearing a loincloth and shouting at the sea. Once a year, he carves a small figurine from the bones of a whale and presents it to the current LOpSoc chairman; if it is a sea mammal, it signifies a year of great prosperity, if a land mammal, a year of shame. |